What is it that I have been really chasing over the past few months?
The you that I once know or the you that have change over the relationship?
I have did a lot of shit in the past. Not knowing how much that it will hurt any others.
But I'm willing to change. You said that you will to give me chance to change, but is it really the fact, the fact that doesnt show the least within this few months?
You said you wont want to go thru the same shit relationship problem again, even when now I'm with you. Then what am I to you when you are saying this? Or even when you delete what I have tag on your board, is it really because I made you piss over the comment or you are afraid to let other know about it? Just like when you let your hands off when you see your friends?
So many things that you had said to me, but seriously, which is really you?
I smash my ego and pride just to wait for the day that you will really love me and return,
but is it really the you that I really want to spend the rest of my life with? Or is it the you that would raise your voice over the phone, hang my phone, the one that wouldnt even want to talk to me, or the one that would go all over me after so much more?
I really regret what I've done, I cant explain how much more I would be, but I really love you, and I will be.

But face the fact, maybe its better for me to let go, for us to stop pretending.